O, Christmas Tree

Ever since I was a small child I have been fascinated by the Christmas tree. As soon as it was decorated, I wanted to turn off all the lights and just sit on the couch and gaze lovingly at the tree.

To this day, I still turn off all the lights and sit on the couch to admire the tree. In fact, I’m doing just that as I type this. Probably on Saturday, I’ll take down the Christmas decorations, so I’m trying to squeeze in the last little bit of face time with the tree.

It’s hard to explain why I find the tree so mesmerizing and why it makes me feel happy and sad at the same time. Christmas trees are symbols of the past, the present and the future. Decorated with a lifetime of memories, they are treasures of the past. Each ornament has a story, a history, a special meaning. As a child, I had my favorite Tweety Bird ornament and I loved pulling out the box filled with fragile Christmas bulbs that had belonged to my great-grandmother.

The ornaments on my tree these days are fairly new; most of them collected since I married five years ago. But I still enjoy thinking about what each one represents. I even started a new tradition of buying a Hallmark ornament that sort of sums up the major event of the year.

In its ornaments and decorations–and by extension, the memories they represent–the Christmas tree is like a scrapbook. Yet, at the same time, the tree represents the present, a celebration of the current holiday season and the new memories that are made.

For me, the Christmas tree pulls my thoughts ahead to future holidays. I wonder what will happen in the coming year. Will life be radically different next Christmas? Will I be missing any loved ones? Will I be living in the same house? In the same state?

Maybe that’s why I like to spend time looking at the tree–it’s an opportunity to capture the moment, to freeze time like a snapshot. For that moment, when it’s just me and tree, all is right and good and peaceful in my world.

And that’s a memory worth repeating each year.